Introverts deliver their best work results when there is peace and quiet surrounding them. It can be very unpleasant to be in surroundings in which more is going on than you can handle.
It is important for everyone to know the level of stimulation that provides them with the greatest well-being. For introverts and sensitive people, the optimal level is typically considerably lower than it is for extroverts.
… It is not a matter of avoiding stimulation but of finding the level that is optimal for you.
Many introverts or highly sensitive people like to have their phones set on silent. They can check it later when they need a break away from whatever they are occupied with. Then they can write an email or text back to ask what it is about before they decide whether to return the call.
Earplugs, earbuds, and dark sunglasses can help protect you. If you work in an open office, it may be possible to put up screens.
It can be different difficult to reject social contact without feeling impolite. Many sensitive people and introverts accept much more social contact in the workplace and privately than they care for.
Sometimes it is not possible to screen yourself sufficiently. Time and again, introverts are highly sensitive people find that they become so stressed from too many activities or impressions that it can be a long time before they feel like they are themselves again.
Whether it’s a graduation gift, a birthday gift, or a present for a special occasion such as Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, sometimes it’s hard to find the best gifts for the introvert in your life.
But one way to show your introverted friend or family member that you care for them is by getting him or her the kind of gift that says, “I know who you are” and “I respect you and your personality type.”
Just like there are ways to never celebrate an introvert’s (or HSP’s) birthday, there are things that you would probably not want to get for an introvert as a present. A sad example is what happened to an introverted friend of mine.
She texted me the crying emoji the day after her birthday, telling me that she didn’t know how to respond when her spouse gave her lingerie as a gift. “How does he not know by now that I don’t feel comfortable in my own skin?” she asked me. “This was a gift for him, not me.”
The sad thing is, her extroverted husband probably had no idea that he hurt his wife’s feelings, and was likely confused that she never wore “her birthday gift” (or should I say, “his birthday gift”?).
These suggested gifts for the introvert in your life will hit the mark and let your introvert friend know that you know, respect, and love them (which is what we all really want, right?).
Does the introvert in your life have a favorite author?
Now I know that not every introvert is a reader. “Introvert” does not have to be synonymous with “bookworm” but it’s probably a good bet that books would be great gifts for introverts.
And if your introvert is a book fan, he probably has one (or several) favorite authors, and it wouldn’t take much to find out who those favorite authors are.
(Hint: Just ask.)
They might be working on collecting all the books by those authors. If you just say, “Oh hey, do you read much sci-fi?” Or “Are you more into fiction or nonfiction?” Seriously a simple question like that will help you easily discover two things:
Whether or not the introvert in your life is a reader
What kind of books they enjoy
From there, it should be easy to discover their favorite authors or series.
Then you can ask if they’ve read a certain book by said favorite author; they might volunteer that they’ve read that book but they don’t own it. Or they might say yeah, they have that book on their shelf but the book they really want is fill-in-the-blanks. And voila, you’ll know which books they have or don’t have.
I have a friend who, every Christmas, got her spouse one more book by a favorite author so that after several years, he had collected an entire shelf of one of his favorite authors.
Related gift:
Another idea (and this is from a book lover) is a first edition. Maybe your introvert friend has a few authors they like who wrote some time ago. Finding a first edition of one of those books might be more pricey but it would definitely be a meaningful and treasured gift.
If it’s an author who is still writing, see if there’s any way you can get a signed copy of one of their books.
2. Noise-Canceling headphones
No, not every introvert is a highly sensitive person or is prone to audio sensitivity, but even if not, introverts do appreciate their times of peace and quiet.
Noise-canceling headphones are the ideal gift for an introvert because they can tune into what’s on their phone (or what’s on their TV or what’s on their computer) without having to tune out everything that’s going on around them.
Just a hint from a fellow introvert, I often wear noise-canceling earbuds around the house to muffle loud sounds, when I’m not even listening to anything. They’re less obvious than the headphones, and are less likely to give me a tension headache (which I sometimes get from wearing headphones for a long period of time).
When the pandemic hit, a close friend gave me a year-long subscription to Masterclass. It was one of the most thoughtful gifts I’d ever received, and it was the perfect time, too. I had the opportunity to watch videos about writing (I loved the videos by Malcolm Gladwell) and also watched a variety of interesting videos with my kids on some of their subjects of interest.
If you have a close friend or family member who’s introverted, a subscription to Masterclass might be the perfect gift.
4. Online Lessons for a Subject of Interest
There are also plenty of non-Masterclass ways to learn all kinds of things, and which don’t require a subscription. For instance, there are some contemporary authors whose website offers video lessons or even one-on-one training. The same for photography, design, make-up, and more!
(This might require doing a bit of homework to find out which ones are reputable; these days, lots of online lessons can be found advertising ways to make money fast in writing, art, digital marketing, and you name it. … In most cases, the only people getting rich quick are the ones offering the overpriced training.)
Anything to go along with the hobbies that your introverted friend is into would make great gifts for introverts. Maybe the introvert in your life is artistic.
Of course, there is a variety of forms of art …
Are they into painting? Sketching? Do they do the hobby themselves or do they just like to collect works of art or original vinyl records of music?
Perhaps they are really into a certain era of art such as impressionistic art or art from a certain century. Of course, you likely can’t get an original Degas, but you could probably get something that’s a replica or even a book about a favorite artist or painter.
6. Gift Card to a Favorite Hobby Store
And if they do the art themselves, a gift card to a hobby store would be an awesome gift for an introvert (or even a gift card to Amazon where they can pick up what they want).
A friend of mine gave my introverted son a gift card for Joanne’s, and he had never gone there before. Since then, it’s become his favorite store, and he’s picked up a lot of ideas.
And so have I, as I’m the one who usually takes him!
A gift card to a store like Hobby Lobby, Michael’s, or Joanne’s is a terrific way to help your introvert friend or family member to discover new hobbies. Maybe you could even plan a shopping trip there, together! (Just be ready to stay a long while!)
Related gift:
If your introverted friend is more into exercise or sports, a better option would be a gift card to a sporting goods store (or a gym membership).
Is your introverted friend a tea drinker? Or a coffee lover?
Gourmet teas (or coffees) are great gifts for the introverts in your life because it’s likely something they won’t buy to treat themselves, but it’s something they’ll truly appreciate!
Other cute options for tea lovers are vintage teapots (look on eBay) or creative tea steepers/infusers.
If the introvert you know prefers coffee, a gift card to their favorite coffee shop is always a great option, but you could always try giving them something more unique, like this Around the World in 12 Coffees sampler collection, or an indulgent coffee gift box.
If the coffee drinker enjoys playing around with flavors, coffee syrups might be a fun gift option.
8. Gourmet Chocolate
While we’re talking about gourmet …
I know no introvert who does not enjoy chocolate (usually, dark chocolate).
You could offer a gift certificate to See’s Candies or take them out to a local gourmet chocolate store and let them pick out a personalized box of chocolates.
Introverts (especially if they are also HSPs) are often sensitive to various aromas. This is why candles can make great gifts for the introvert in your life.
Usually, scents that are too strong or too sweet won’t be as appreciated, but the more natural scents are often a good option.
10. Diffuser and Scented Oils
On the same vein, getting your introverted friend an aromatherapy diffuser (if he or she doesn’t already have one) would be a thoughtful present.
If they already have a diffuser, you could opt for gifting them a set of diffuser essential oils.
Related gift:
An aromatherapy lotion could also be a great option, like this lavender and vanilla lotion that promotes relaxation and sleep.
Closing Thoughts
Life is busy, and there have been many times when a dear friend or family member’s birthday has flown past and all I end up giving them is a belated card.
It’s terrible, but true.
We get busy and we forget things, even when it comes to people we love and deeply respect or admire.
But it doesn’t have to be like this. By slowing down and being more mindful, we’re more likely to remember things like upcoming birthdays or special days. By setting aside a bit of time to choose (and prepare/order/shop for) the perfect gift, that’s how we show our friends that we truly care about them.
I hope these suggestions of gifts for the introvert in your life are helpful next time you’re wracking your brain trying to think of the best gift for your loved ones.
When I was little, my parents were missionaries in a foreign country. It would be years before I discovered terms like introvert and extrovert; I don’t know to this day if my early experiences in that country played a part in me being an introvert.
Basically, my foreignness attracted a lot of attention, attention I didn’t want. It got to where I didn’t want to go out with my parents. I was afraid to set foot outside because strangers would come up and pinch my cheeks. It was supposed to be a compliment, to show that I was cute or something …
But sometimes they pinched hard, and my cheeks would be smarting and red afterward. I was only three or four and it didn’t feel like I was being rewarded by their attention but punished.
So, for me as a young child, attention was synonymous with punishment, not reward. (I wonder what Pavlov would have done with that information. I’m sure Skinner and Watson would have seen my personal experiences strengthen their respective theories on operant conditioning.)
As missionaries, my parents tried teaching us kids to be outgoing. They taught us songs to sing, and even actions to go along with the songs. My sisters and I had to wear matching outfits for programs, and being outgoing and friendly was pretty much a requirement. Two of my sisters were outgoing. They were extroverts, so it wasn’t a problem. One sister and myself as well were (and are) introverts. The lifestyle of missionaries in a foreign country wasn’t so easy for us, to say the least.
But it’s not just in the realm of social work that this is the case. We live in a world that often celebrates extroverted qualities such as sociability, assertiveness, and outspokenness. In such a world, introverts can sometimes feel overshadowed or misunderstood. However, introversion is not a weakness to be overcome but a unique strength to be embraced.
But how?
Let’s explore the power of introversion together. We need to learn to celebrate the strengths of introverted people as well as explore insights into how introverts can thrive in a world that often seems designed for extroverts.
Understanding Introversion:
Introversion is often misunderstood as shyness or social awkwardness, but that’s not it at all. Not all introverts are shy; some can appear quite bold or outgoing around others. And we’re not all socially awkward (although I definitely am!).
Introversion is a personality trait characterized by a preference for calm, minimally stimulating environments, and a need for solitude to recharge. Introverts also tend to be introspective, thoughtful, and observant. They often have a rich inner world that fuels their creativity and deep thinking, especially if their introversion coincides with high sensitivity.
The Quiet Strength of Introverts:
Instead of trying to conform to extroverted ideals (using methods that were popularized in well-known books like How to Win Friends and Influence People), introverts can benefit from embracing their unique tendencies and harnessing the strengths that come with introversion.
For example, introverts are often excellent listeners and deep thinkers, traits that can lead to profound insights and meaningful connections with others. Their preference for solitude allows them to recharge and reflect, leading to greater self-awareness and personal growth. Embracing these traits will help you grasp the power of introversion in your life.
Navigating the Extroverted World:
Living in a predominantly extroverted world can pose challenges for us who are introverts, but it is possible to thrive by understanding and leveraging our strengths. A few ways to survive and thrive in an extrovert-oriented world include:
Setting boundaries for what you need to stay healthy and sane
Creating a balance between socializing and solitude that works for you
Finding a work environment that suits your preferences and needs
You owe it to yourself to honor your particular needs and develop your unique strengths.
Recommended Books on Introversion:
If you want to explore the trait of introversion in-depth, here are a few books I highly recommend!
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain – This book explores the power of introversion and how introverts can thrive in a world that often favors extroverted qualities. Cain provides insights into the strengths of introversion and offers practical advice for introverts and those who interact with them. I love this book!
The Introvert Advantage: How Quiet People Can Thrive in an Extrovert World by Marti Olsen Laney, Psy.D. – Dr. Marti Olsen Laney delves into the science behind introversion and explains how introverts can leverage their strengths to thrive in various aspects of life, including relationships, work, and personal growth. This book also provides coping strategies in the realm of parenting (including parenting an introverted child).
Quiet Power: The Secret Strengths of Introverted Kids by Susan Cain – While not specifically for adults, this book by Susan Cain focuses on introverted children. It’s basically the kids’ version of Quiet, mentioned above, and offers great insight as to how parents and educators can support and nurture their unique qualities to help them thrive in a world that may not always understand them. (Gosh, I wish my parents had read this book when I was little.)
Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life is Your Hidden Strength by Laurie Helgoe – This insightful book by psychologist (and introvert) Laurie Helgoe offers a guide to harnessing the potential of the introverted life, including discovering your own unique strengths, accessing the power of solitude, overcoming stereotypes, and aiming for success in your own quiet way.
Embrace Your Quiet Strength as an Introvert:
In short, introversion is a valuable and powerful personality trait. It’s not something to be embarrassed about. You don’t have to hide the fact that you need to recharge after that social gathering, or that you’d rather have a day of sunshine in the park than a night of dancing and drinking at the local pub.
You have unique strengths that you can offer, both to individuals in your circle, and to society as a whole. By embracing your introversion, understanding your strengths, and navigating the world in a way that honors your needs and preferences, you can be freed to live a fulfilling and meaningful life—whatever that means for you.
The Highly Sensitive Introvert 